An Unfortunate Family: Terminal Illness and the Altering of the Attachment Bond

This article emphasizes the value of a therapeutic presence in terminal death situations. An unusual clinical case illustrates the point. The presenting issue was aggression between an adult son and father. It soon became apparent, however, that this son was profoundly enmeshed with his mother. During the course of family therapy the father died, and then the mother was diagnosed with cancer. The therapist changed therapeutic goals and attended to the relationship between mother and son. He made home visits to the mother and the surviving son. She seemed to die peacefully and the son moved on with his life, which prior to the death of his mother would not have appeared likely because of his profound dependence on her.

Resolving pathological attachment is not easy. Attachment theory refers to the affectional bonds or attachments, initially between child and parent and later between adult and adult. It is suggested that terminal illness and death can, with help of a therapist, alter this attachment bond, even though the literature on adult dependency and attachment does not refer to death in this manner.