A Doctor Looks Back on Her Path to Psychiatry
A family tragedy propelled Suzanne Watson from her calling as an Episcopal priest to a midlife decision to become a psychiatrist.
For many people, the year 2001 conjures up 9/11 and alarming images of planes crashing into the Twin Towers in New York City. But for Suzanne Watson, M.D., a resident in psychiatry and family medicine at the University of Cincinnati, 2001 has a more personal and poignant significance.
That was the year her husband, a neurologist and chief of staff at a community hospital in central California, began a downward spiral. He died by suicide in 2002, leaving Watson a widow at age 40 with four young children between the ages of 3 and 9.
As Watson reflected on the event that has shaped much of her adult life, including her decision to become a psychiatrist, she kept coming back to her belief that stigma played a large role in her husband’s death. He was able to hide his deepening depression very well, and he hesitated to reach out for help because he worried about the impact it would have on his career. When he finally sought treatment, he consulted with multiple colleagues, which had an unexpected outcome.
“He was prescribed multiple SSRIs,” Watson told Psychiatric News. “In retrospect, I think he had undiagnosed bipolar disorder. Today, he would have had a much better chance of receiving a correct diagnosis.”
At the time of her husband’s death, Watson was close to being ordained as an Episcopal priest. Interestingly, though, the ministry hadn’t been her first career choice. Watson had started medical school as a young woman but had dropped out to care for her growing family. Now she found herself at another crossroads. She moved to Carmel, Calif., for a fresh start. But even in a new place, putting the tragedy behind her proved to be challenging.
“My husband’s memory was so big and the loss so great that it felt like we were still a family of six, even though my husband was no longer with us,” said Watson. “So I took a big risk and found a job in New Zealand for a year. It was there that we redefined our family and learned to rely on each other.”
Watson described the moment when the transformation took place. The family decided to take an arduous hike up a mountainous volcano. At one point, the family reached a sheer, slippery cliff that each person had to cross independently. “I see that moment as a metaphor for when we came back from grief,” recalled Watson. “We could now go home and begin our new life as a family of five.”
Watson resumed her work with the church in the United States, but the desire to become a physician never left her. Finally, when she turned 50, her son told her to either take the leap and try to go to medical school or stop talking about it. She realized he was right, and she applied and was accepted at Wake Forest School of Medicine in Winston-Salem, N.C.
Today, she feels that she landed in the right place. “Becoming a doctor and focusing on mental health is as much of a calling as being in the ministry,” noted Watson. “I’m just serving God in a different way.”
At age 57 and with two more years of training ahead of her, Watson is starting to think about the direction of her career. Her thoughts often turn to her grandfather, a psychiatrist, who lived next door and had his practice in his home. He believed in the importance of nutrition in mental health, a controversial idea back in the 1960s.
“I used to watch with wonder as patients came and went from his office,” recalled Watson. “It was one of my first glimpses at the connection between medicine and relationships. I think it planted the seed for my interest in psychiatry.”
As she considers her next steps, she finds herself drawn to many aspects of the field. She could see herself working in geriatrics, hospice care, or addiction psychiatry. Wherever she finds herself, Watson knows she will continue to be an advocate for suicide prevention.
“I want to work with people in the aftermath of terrible, life-altering events and help them develop the tools to move forward. I want to help my patients uncover what parts of life they really value. By offering hope and helping individuals become more resilient, I think I can show them how to use their experiences to fuel change, leading to a rich and fulfilling life.” ■
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Psychiatric News
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Published online: 16 October 2019
Published in print: October 5, 2019 – October 18, 2019
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